Sometimes you just need to keep pushing through ...

When I was  listening  to my Itouch on the way to work, it clicked over to Miley and her song The Climb - now I will admit to having it on my Itouch - for a couple of reasons - I like the song message, but I also like the way she sounds! there said it -- I have a disney pop sensation on my Itouch - that one song.

It could not have been played at a more appropriate time, feeling a little down but not horribly low.. just one of those days when I want something  in my life, something different then what I have now - not more just different ( which makes no sense - so no need to analyize it to death).

I should be happy - I weighed in today and have returned back to the 12 pound weight loss mark ( had a couple of weeks there where it crept up a few pounds, after I was sick, now back down) I have great friends, a good stable job, a wonderful home and family.. so yeah I know poor me right?

One of the things I don't do well is be --- sad -- I don't like depression or sadness in myself let alone anyone else - so it comes off more like anger and / or withdrawn and disintereseted,  then what it truely is.. I believe this is the case because, I have all my life been a people pleaser and people don't like when the "happy good girl" isn't happy. Bbelieve me I know, have had friends tell me this. Yet if someone who is typically quiet, on the reserve side is  extra quiet or sad -- no one says a thing! -- I know rambling but his this what your getting today!

I  am often described as pleasant, funny and entertaining to be around oh and nice. You know what I am.
Tired and sometimes I really don't want to be nice -- yet it is this thing inside me that makes me do it!  Like the good girl monster or something!

So with an effort  --- I am going to learn to say NO to people ( when I don't want to do something), Not always give up my seat on the bus ( this would really actually shock me if I did this because I actually hate when people don't) and  I am not going to hold doors open at subways, and malls etc only to stand there for 10 minutes while people walk through without saying thank you! and I am going to stop apogizing to furniture I bump into, I think nice and good girls always get the short end of the stick -- sure we have lots of friends, and people like us ( I have won an award or two for being nice) but you know what --- I think those types -- you know mouthy , opinionated and loud ( wait that might be me too) seem to have a bit more fun! They also in some industries tend to be leaders in their fields -- and guess what the nice girl is the one off to the right holding her bag.

Hmmm, something for me to think about -- may be a rant, but it is what it is -- today you got my uncensored thoughts..

My mom has a good quote on her email signature that says :

 "It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit." - Harry Truman  

I think this is a FANTASTIC team work quote -- and 98% of the time I do feel exactly the same way -- but sometimes -- it would be nice to get credit -- rather then assumptions that you will just do it anyways -- team work is not just at work - it is in the community, in the home and in life all around us.

Live Love Laugh --- rant